Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Holy sore nipples Batman
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
