so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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