no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
