Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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