so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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