I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
