i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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