Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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