They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Of course I have a pirate flag
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
