I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
