i just had sex bonerless
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
