I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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