so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
