I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
