also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
