Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
