Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
