doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
