you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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