You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
