Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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