I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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