Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
