dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
