i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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