the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
