Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
