I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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