David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
