this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
