I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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