they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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