How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You took a bar mat shot.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
