So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
