Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
