he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
