Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
