So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
