so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
