But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I have demons in me.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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