The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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