i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
