You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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