we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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