people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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