Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
