fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
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