Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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