they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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