Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Fuck appropriateness.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm sobbing to NWA
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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